To say it’s been a tough week is an understatement. The ramping up of what I can only call ‘the campaign to make me lose everything’ started to intensify last Thursday.
That morning I excitedly went to see a temporary flat that a service provider, contracted by the council, offered me. I’d done my budget calculations and it would be tight but as I was working I could of afforded it just. The flat was a box, one small heater, shower and in a room so small there was no space for the hand basin. Still I was considering it there was a nice garden I could see out of the bedroom window, once I squeezed round the double bed (why does a single person need a double bed in a flat so small?). It had cupboards with doors hiding the bookcase shelves built inside, these lined the corridor area from small kitchen/sofa area to shower cupboard/bedroom, this corridor even had a bit of carpet, the only place in the flat that did.
I asked to be able to read the tenancy agreement before I signed, it was 19 pages long. Luckily I’ve got an eye for detail and I asked what charges would be added as the 19page document said some where compulsory. I also asked what the communal areas were and what right of access others like the landlord had. No communal areas but I could enter the garden to check the gas meter. No charges. Landlord had the right to enter once a year. This seemed a bit strange temporary accommodation that I would be in for over a year but more worrying was the lack of any where to dry my clothes, there was a washing machine but the heater was only just big another for 1 t-shirt to dry plus if you dry all your clothes inside the place gets moldy with damp. Plus it was tiny and Band B council tax that an extra £81 a month. I had to turn it down. But what was that double bed about did they want me to turn to prostitution to afford the place as the rent was more than housing benefit.
That evening starving hungry and unfortunately dying for the loo, I went to a homeless meal that I used to like going to, you can also pick up a book to read there. 3 times I had to ask if I could use the loo as the staff blocked my entry. They said yes each time but blocked me with they’re bodies. I had to ask if I should get a bucket and go in a corner before they allowed me to empty my painful bladder. I sat down the staff crowded round me, invading my personal space, when I asked one of them to remove their hand from my knee they called the police. A volunteer tried to lead me out of the door with a cup of tea, in a similar sort of fashion as the one you’d use when trying to coax a wayward dog. I had a plate of hot food placed in front of me, I think I took 1 bite when there were 2 police officers next to me telling me if I didn’t leave I would be arrested. That’s right if I ate the plate of hot food placed in front of me by staff I would be arrested. I was starving but eating would be taken as a criminal offence. Police told me I was lucky not to be charged. This is just one example of how homeless are psychologically abused by people who seem to need to exert power over those who have basically nothing. Not allowed to call it bullying and actually I think it’s slightly different from bullying more like a mental illness, prehaps it’s a soft form of draptomania.
The food incident is I reckon the same type of behaviour that I heard happened to a man begging in southern England. He had someone burn a £20 note in front of his face. I do think it is the illness Draptomania the power trip that says “I have someone you really need but I’d rather destroy it in front of your face than let you have it”. I think everyone can see how much of a dangerous mental illness makes someone do that.
I’ve also had similar power trip behaviours from some colleagues at work. I picked the job up pretty quickly apparently most folk take 4 months. I could sort of tell something was brewing, especially on my last shift before I had a week off. I stuck it out loved the banter with customers. Then the email that was supposed to contain my pay slip came. There’s a big difference between a pay slip and an attachment that even gmail flags up as containing a virus. When I checked my bank on the day I should of been paid no pay showed up.
At a weekend meal one of the men who’s usual behaviour is violent threatening bullying, decided that I was the cause of all the problems that he’d ever had in his whole life. I was told to move to a seat away from my friends, because the bully was looking daggers and throwing food at me. If I glanced in his direction it was all my fault that he was threatening me, throwing the food etc. I was actually told that if I looked at him again I would have to leave. Talk about double standards!
Some of you will know that I use Twitter as a way to feel less alone, more like a normal human. Unfortunately the powers that be don’t like this and mess up my analytics presumably in an attempt to make me feel helpless and alone.
Look closely at these pictures. The first one shows how many times accounts have seen my tweets. Everytime an account sees a tweet an impression is made. No impressions means nobody saw a thing. Bit like the 3 wise monkeys if you see no evil and you have no evil you can speak no evil and so no evil can possibly exist. Quick empty all the prisons let all the murders, rapists and thieves out as the 3 wise monkeys thinking says there is no evil. I know the 3 wise monkeys are actually dishonest dumb crooks and think in a way that ensures bullying and abuse continues to children, elderly and anyone who finds themselves in a position of powerlessness.
Back to those screenshots. See the second one, this shows how many times a tweet was interacted with. If you like a tweet, share it or reply to a tweet it creates an engagement. So by comparing the two pictures you can clearly see the 3 wise monkeys of Twitter say nobody saw any of my tweets on a day when 4 people shared tweets that they obviously could not of seen.
It’s called gaslighting. Attempts to change reality and then swear blind that nothing has changed. Gaslighting is psychological abuse. Trust you own memory and keep a record. If you keep a diary especially a non electronic one you can keep track of reality. The 3 wise monkeys will find it hard to change your diary.
The book 1984 by Goerge Orwell, good one to read if you have a chance, has the state party use 3 wise monkey gaslighting. There’s one part where the state newspaper announces the good news that the chocolate ration has gone up from a third of an ounce to a quarter of an ounce. For those who live in a decimal world that’s a change from 0.33 to 0.25. Just because the propaganda says the chocolate ration has increased doesn’t mean it actually has.
It’s a bit like the new term for global warming, its now called climate change. I don’t know about your area of the world but here in Scotland it’s got blooming freezing very suddenly, much colder than it was this time last year. It’s quite hard to make people think about global warming when they are scrapping the ice off the car with numb fingers. But it is climate change not global warming we have to worry about now. Wouldn’t mind a bit of global warming it’s freezing.
Before I was homeless, before I went to university I lived in a street where people would talk about things like, governments controlling the weather via a device called HARRP or HAARP, planes leaving chemical trails of aluminium different from vapour trials, direct energy weapons or DEWs which are used on activists and inflict insomnia, pain, weird spots on the skin. I don’t particularly want to believe any of these things are true but my current insomnia is unlike any I’ve experienced before and a friend who’s been around me a lot showed me a spot that looks exactly like the ones my friends showed me online a long time ago.
I’ve heard of dirty drugs increasing around Christmas time to kill off drug addicts and I’ve seen this happen with my own eyes. 2 overdoses within about 2 weeks last Christmas time. I hope this weather is just a weird natural seasonal thing as it’s defiantly clod enough to freeze folk to death and unfortunately after what I’ve seen wouldn’t put it past them.
I’ve only put a fraction of the last week, left out Work coach confidentuality breach, play about homelessness which was so full of contradictions, lots of things that didn’t add up, use of English slang when it was based in Scotland and supposedly written by Scottish people, it seemed to be a parody of my time on streets in Scotland, they got most of it wrong. The semi threatening glare from a man who likes to act intimidating does little to ease my suspicions. I’m driven from most support services because I don’t actually need the you have no rights let us take over your life support that’s offered. I need a home, opportunities, dignity, respect, psychological safety, privacy, all those nice things that are nicely wrapped up in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Unfortunately I’m homeless so not entitled to any human rights.
I’m going to leave you with a screen shot of malware that’s been hidden deep in my phone. I never agreed to BBC Agent on my phone, I don’t even know what it is.
Stay safe out there, pay attention and trust your heart. Don’t let the 3 wise monkeys deceive you.